Down Sunday

It's a down dreary Sunday with drizzle and dark mood forecasted. Haven't heard from anyone on Facebook. Work has me down as the enormity of the future in the factory pulls down on me. I haven't been writing which I should with the book release party coming up. I think I am holding on too tight again. I am pegged on the stress meter. Loneliness just seasons the pain with Cayene pepper. I ran out of gas yesterday because of my stupidity. Dad came to rescue me. If I had a gas can with me I wouldn't have called him. I took it out of the trunk for the mower and forgot to replace it. It sort of fit me like a theme of my current life.

I long to touch someone again. I know it's part of the reason I talk with E. That history of passion is like a blow torch in my memory just like W. I had accepted being alone for the first time. W. woke me up to the beauty of intimacy. She promised me I wouldn't be alone anymore. 30 days and she ditched me like a new lemon car. I am a lemon. No, I am not really sour and bitter. Just sad. I try not to dwell anymore. Lexapro has been working pretty good. I think the drastic changes to my sleep pattern are messing with me.

I am going to nap now.

Peace

dumbdavid